Conflict In Marriage

Conflict In Marriage

Message tract. 03.2006.10

 The major causes of conflict in marriage is living out side God’s will for life and marriage. Genesis 1:28 (amp) says that after creation God blessed man and woman and put them to multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, in other words use its vast resources in the service of God and man. We also find that when Adam was created, God said that it was not sufficient that man should be alone but would need a help mate and that is why woman was created. Then in Malachi chapter 2 v 15 we see that God’s purpose for marriage is that through it, a generation of God-fearing children could be raised for Him.

So the purpose of life is that man helped by woman should manage the earth and use its vast resources to serve God and fellow man and to raise up God fearing offspring to carry forward the will of God. Therefore any thing done out side this will always generate conflict in life and marriage.

 Common Causes Of Conflict In Marriage

1. Wrong leadership: Occurs when the wife usurp the power of leadership contrary to the teaching that wives should submit to their husbands found in Galatians 5:22-23. It also occurs when the husband abuses his leadership contrary to the counsel of Galatians 5:25 which advices husbands to love their wives sacrificially just as Christ loved the church. Such a love would bring about trust and unity as all decision made by the husband would not cause any harm at all to his wife.
2. Un godly management of resources.
3. Resentment: feeling bitter, indignant or angry at your partner. Many times this occurs when one partner thinks the other is a burden, contributes nothing, is unfair etc.
4. Failure to love.
5. Un forgiveness
6. Adultery/perverted sexual practice
7. Suspicion: this takes away trust and brings about error in judgments.
8. Listening to rumors about your partner.
9. Distractive criticism: that undermines the spirit of appreciating one another.
10. Heeding wrong advice about your marriage from unqualified people.
11. Poor communication line: causes the enemy Satan to put wrong imaginations to fill up the gap, caused by lack of communication thus generating more conflict.
12. Selfishness (disregarding the interests of your partner).
13. External control: from extended family members.
14. Lack of a good sexual relationship/ impotency.
15. Irresponsibility
16. Laziness
17. Childlessness
18. Drunkard ness
19. Generational curses: that carry forward marital problems of the past generation to the couple.
20. Witchcraft spells can operate against a marriage: when there is an opening that they can use to generate conflict meant to break the marriage.
21. Spirit husbands and wives: will in one-way or the other try to influence the couples to do things against  one another that  will always generate conflict.

The effect of conflict in a marriage is misery for all involved. It causes people whose parents had such a conflict to have fear about marriage and not know how to handle marriage thus causing them to carry forward the same mistakes in their own marriages.

 The most effective way to handle marriage and do away with conflict in marriage is to fall back to the counsel of God’s word, which instructs husbands to love their wives, and wives to submit to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:21-25, 1 Peter 5:6-9, Mal. 2:15 and James 4:7). The right counsel should also be sought and petitions and intercessory prayers made over issues that generate conflicts in marriage. Where there is a strong evidence of demonic activities and generational curses, deliverance prayers are necessary. And God will always cause His grace to abound to put things right in marriage. May God bless you.

George Oduch  (Pastor) Victory Church of Christ luzira, P.O. Box 34167 Kampala, Tel: 256 41 222700, 256 772- 465293. E-Mail: victorychurchofchrist@yahoo.com